Stupid weight

This afternoon, I had the happy privilege of getting to redo my birth control.  It's not that exciting, and though the actual appointment was something nice, given the appointment, but, it was a good thing.  The doctor had a really great bedside manner and even Thomas noted that it was a pleasant visit.  As pleasant as a visit can go I guess.  I don't even really hurt today, which is pretty nice too.  I did however, get weighed while I was there.  I am not very happy with this.  I know that I have resolved to lose this thick shit around my middle, and I have failed at trying very hard at this point.  I have started a few times now, and I have gotten into in for about 4 days, and then I stop again.  I hate that about me.  I want to do something about it, but, I feel like I have, still, no motivation for it.  And then I got weighted today.  It wasn't exactly the best weight in that I have had.  I am thinking that I am going to do my part.  I can't keep eating things that are bad for me, and I have to get sleep at night, and I really have to workout daily.  I just have to stop making excuses for it.  While, I do feel like my medical procedure has prohibited me from doing anything today, that and a head cold, I think I can take this on.  I have to have me time in order to feel better and look better.  I don't think I look bad, but, I just can't seem to like the way I look.  My face is pretty and all, and as my sister was so kind to point out this weekend, I did get my mother's good looks, but, I have a body that I am not proud of... so, I am going to be proud of my self.  I am a beautiful woman, and I want my outside to make my inside as well...    I want to look good in shorts and tank tops... I love the way that I look.... :)