Follow up to Self Motivation

In talking to Thomas after I finished writing the last entry, we talked some more about self motivation and he (being the super smart guy that I love) asked me many more questions that I thought was important to follow up with. 

To start with, I think that there are two different kinds of people in the world, those who are internally motivated, and those who need external motivation.  I am the second kind of person in these categories, Thomas and Kelsie are the first kind.  I am glad that I get to be around those who are not like me.  (Not only that, I love Thomas because he's a free thinker, someone who was taught to question everything and to live in reality and not the fantasy land that I so enjoy being in most of the time.)  I was reading the other day about how your birth order can determine whether you are one who can move to think for themselves and those who compare themselves to others with the intent on winning in their performance.  I am one of those people.  Born to be a middle child, but I always compared myself to my sisters... and once we were in school I found it easy to compete with others around me... I was in Speech and Debate, ran track and cross country (though only one year of that, that shit wasn't fun... I'm wasn't a long distance person at that point, nor did I want to become one), played in the band, I did things that made me compete with others.. I wanted to be the best, no matter what I was doing.  I didn't often succeed with that, but, I tried and really worked hard at doing my best to be the best.  I realize now how much better I could have been if I only practiced a little bit more... I was just lazy.

Which brings me to me, again, with being lazy.  I was thinking the other night, that I just don't know how to be self motivated and Kelsie comes back in from taking out the trash and asks if I want to work out... Now?  Really, you just ate? So she said yeah, and I said, sounds good to me.  What are we going to do? Zumba.  OK, sounds good to me.  And as soon as her dad came back in, I wondered if he had anything to do with it... I mean, he knows that I like to have someone to work out with, and it seemed almost out of the blue that she asked... She hasn't asked me to work out in a long time, though we have done so in recent weeks.  So, we Zumba-ed... it was a lot of fun! We laughed a lot and were pretty sweaty afterwards.  It was as though she knew that I wanted to work out just lacked the personal motivation to get it done.  Very interesting indeed!

The next morning, I was to wake her up and we would do it again, this time, in the morning before school and work.  I got up late.  Woke her up and we didn't Zumba that day.  I feel like it should be my responsibility to get it done everyday, for me at least.  I thought about how this Wednesday was the start of Lent, I could do something for it.  I'm not too big on giving things up for Lent, however, I could try to do something for it instead.  So, I am going to Zumba for Lent.  And I told Thomas that we are going to have sex everyday for 40 days... I look good when I'm getting some regularly... My face is all bright and shiny and my skin looks good... Now to start tanning too... I would look amazing at the end of those 40 days!

It's day three of Lent, I have yet to Zumba today, or anything else.  For the most part, it's been a very lazy for me.  I did manage to get out of the house, get money orders for bills, wash the cars, purchase a few little things for the house.  Dish soap is always good to have, so are socks and shorts.  I have a nice new goal that I am looking forward to trying.  I am motivated to do this.  It's a small thing, but, I have to.  Self motivation starts with me... And I am ready to look within to get this done :)