I have discovered in the last year that I love to run. Not because it think it's great exercise or anything like that, I am not a big fan of the word exercise. I prefer to say that I run so can come home and drink a beer and stretch and meditate. That's what I love about it. Not anything great about running 5 miles but, that stretch. I love it.
On Sunday, I took myself on my first full 5 mile run that I have ever done without stopping to walk or anything. I was super stoked that I was finally able to relax into it and go. About the time I hit almost 5 miles, there was a truck that drove past me with it's confederate flag waving proudly and I started to think about that flag and what it meant to me, but, more importantly, what did mean to the south back then. What did it represent to them, that was worth fighting for? Certainly the argument can be made it was about fighting for slavery, and I would say that's mostly correct. I am seriously offended when I hear, why this flag is such a great one, and the south will rise again line of horse shit! Whatever. But I had watched Gone With the Wind this week, and while I know it's a bit fictitious, it's the way of life.
So then it got me thinking, what was it about this life that was so great? To start, life was simple, you knew where your station was in life and for the rich, I don't really think much has changed. They still get sent to private schools and compete fiercely in sports, which leads them to be competitive in life which in turn, keep the rich, rich. This is really what I got out of it: The way of life to them was worth preserving. They had slaves, true and that shit's bad, but, there was more. The gentlemen were just that, gentlemen. They opened doors for ladies, they stood up when I woman walked into the room, or when she got the table or the get up from the table. They knew what manners were, they were able to learn to run their homes, which, in these cases were huge farms. I run a small household and that's not always easy. There was always scandals and gossip but there is that now. The women, they were actual ladies. They knew how to entertain, how to run the house, discipline the kids, teach their daughters how to be ladies and have manners and they could throw a party. Not just a run of the mill party, but, huge massive events that took weeks to plan. And it seemed everyone gave a party at least once during the season. The dresses were never too revealing, though there was a lot of cleavage that could be seen.
And then, if you look back to the where did they get this idea of high society and such, it came from England. The Regency era was alive for many years from the 1700's to the mid 1900's. Oh the fashion has changed and hem lines got shorts and neck lines plunged deeper, the scandals were just the same, but, this was a way of thinking in polite society. The beauty pageants that we see now, are in memory of a time gone by. Big dresses and hair, learning how to dance and sing, have different talents, be able to handle yourself in a conversation. These things were a representation of the South. I love all these things, the hair, the dresses, the carriage rides, the hand that helps a lady out of the vehicle. At least, that's what I see.
We now live in a world where these things are laughed at. To be polite is be passive and to help a lady is considered to be pussy whipped. A woman is laughed at when she wants to get dressed up to go out, or even to dress up for anything. We think that nice jeans will suffice for that party. The way that we treat each other as people, mates, friends, spouses, I think is just terrible. We have lost the pride and respect for ourselves.
I see the ones who say that the Confederate flag is not a symbol of oppression or slavery, it's of the south. Yet these are the ones who aren't doing that way of life any justice. They have mistaken the word southern for redneck. A redneck is a whole other ball of wax that I don't wish to talk about. But this is what I have to say to those who think it's still ok to say that's just what you're proud of. Then be proud of that way of thinking. Open the door for your lady, kiss her hand when she greets you, compliment her on her dress. Learn to be what we would call a gentleman. And Ladies... Respect yourself. Let them open the door. If your man opens the door for you, he is not trying to take away all the freedom that you have, he's not trying to tell you that you are incapable of this life without him, he's simply opening the door. It's a way that people show they care, or they are respectful to you. Learn to be a lady.
Bottom line is this, I can't make you any less of a racist bigot than what you already are. We are all a bigot in some ways, and it's a flaw that I try to work on every day. But if you're going to be proud to be Southern, and wave that flag like you were there in the war hoping that your way of life would be preserved, then perhaps you should learn what it meant to be Southern, not a redneck.
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